wednesday meditations

I can sometimes sit for two hours in a room with almost no thought. Just complete stillness. Sometimes when I go for walks, there’s also complete stillness; there’s no mental labeling of sense perceptions. There’s simply a sense of awe or wonder or openness, and that’s beautiful.

Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence. ~Eckhart Tolle

fragile beauty

When I was dealing with chronic health problems some years ago my mom once told me that she didn’t know how I did it. She said she wouldn’t have the strength or courage to do what I did, which was to go on. She has been very ill for a year now herself. This past week was particularly rough and she ended up spending twenty-four hours in the hospital. Yesterday, she said that a year ago she expected that she would be healthy by now and back her normal life. Now she is facing the reality that perhaps she will have to accept a new “normal”.

I remember struggling with the idea of acceptance and hope when I was sick. I think that when you face an illness, or most any other great challenge in your life, you need to embrace a little bit of both. You also learn that courage has nothing to do with strength or weakness, it’s really just a choice: to do the right thing, to find the blessings in the worst of times, or perhaps to simply choose to go on.

Mr. bookbabie took the photo above. It’s of a baby crane near his office that fell out of its nest is now living rather precariously in small tree. The mother is still caring for it and we hope that it can survive until it’s big enough to make it on its own. Isn’t it beautiful?

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow. ~Mary Anne Radmacher

wordless wednesday

naked words

I finished reading Mark Matousek’s book, When You’re Falling Dive last night. The author takes a look at how disaster transforms people by interviewing and seeking advice from many different people who have been touched with adversity. One chapter, entitled “Nakedness” begins with this passage: We must accept heartbreak to be fully human. We cannot love without tasting some blood, nor connect without braving some chink in our armor. Those who are most spiritually naked, most transparent, are also those who see most fully. “Let the scar of the heart be seen,” said the prophet Mohammad. “For by their scars are known the men who are in the way of Love.”

I like that term, spiritually naked. I think that’s how it is when you become a parent, the love you feel for your baby is so raw you have no choice but to become spiritually naked. Many new parents are surprised by the force of that love, the uncontrollable fierceness of it. They are both surprised and frightened by it because with it comes the possibility of such profound heartbreak. We love and we lose. Someone I know who is grieving a relationship said that she had wasted the past ten years with her lover because they broke up. Do you think that’s true? Can love be wasted?

Anyhoo, the book was a good read if you’re feeling introspective (as I seem to be lately). Check it out next time you’re at the bookstore. The photo is of my niece Ayrielle, I just want to pinch those chubby little cheeks every time I see her:)

artsy fartsy friday

Which Famous Artist Are You?

You are Ansel Adams. Your artistic tool of choice is the camera, but you’ve got lots of other skills as well. Spoiled when you were young, you grew up to be a loving person and you have a deep affinity for nature and all things black and white.

Click on the heading to take the quiz:)

The only things in my life that compatibly exists with this grand universe are the creative works of the human spirit. ~Ansel Adams

wordless wednesday

Our friend Joe bought a 1969 Mustang and fixed it up, isn’t it pretty? I took the pic at a car show then darkened the background. I didn’t add the sun reflections, the sun actually did that part for me! My first car portrait:)

happy birthday lizzi!

Today is my daughter’s birthday, she’s a beautiful 26 year old woman now but she’ll always be our little girl!

censored saturday

Mr. bookbabie came home Wednesday and asked me if I wanted to go with him to Tonawanda, New York, he needed to make a last minute visit to an account he has there. As you may have guessed by the photos, Tonawanda borders the Niagara River and Niagara Falls. I decided to go, mostly because I liked the idea of running away from home for a few days. We thought that we might stop in Toronto for one night too, driving from Detroit it’s about two hours shorter if you cut through Canada, so we grabbed our passports and took off…

*** I decided the remainder of this post sounded too whiny so I censored myself and just put up more pics instead:)

play ball

I’ve been thinking about grief and stress and how people deal with life when things go very wrong and whether you can really “choose” your reaction to the curve balls that life throws you. And life will throw you curves, that’s a given for all of us eventually and one that I sometimes think we try too hard to shield our children from, especially here in 21st century America. Everybody has “stuff”, so I wonder, why do some people’s knees buckle under the weight of all that stuff, while other people seem to accept that weight, do a few push-ups, and use it to grow stronger?

It’s not the load that breaks you down – it’s the way you carry it. ~Lou Holtz

pool days

We have had a wonderful weekend here in Michigan. It’s been sunny and dry for three straight days (imagine that!). We finally cranked up the pool heater and on Saturday had some family over to swim. My brother and his gang came up from Louisville, those are his twins Laural and Davis in the pic with their one-year-old second cousin Aryielle. Aryielle is our newly diagnosed diabetic. She is doing pretty well, she doesn’t cry when she gets poked (just when they change her diapers!) and my sister (her grandma the nurse) and niece almost have her blood sugars regulated. Diabetes is a tough disease to manage, especially in a baby and we are now part of that club that is hoping and praying for a cure someday. Little Aryielle went swimming for the first time yesterday and loved it

the winner is…

The winner of my summer book giveaway contest is (insert drum roll)…Dennis at Pappy’s Balderdash! Now not to worry, the fix is not in, Pappy’s undignified begging did not help his chances one bit. Actually, not choosing a chick-lit book seemed to help everyone’s chances this time around, there were about half as many entrants than there were for the spring book giveaway. Oh well, Lief Enger is a wonderful writer and I’m sure Dennis will enjoy the read:)

(kinda) wordless wednesday

I took this photo today for my iStock account, I hope they accept it! I really enjoy playing with the lighting so that my photos almost look like paintings. Hmm, maybe I should just start painting again:)